Just another day at the grocery store?

Not at all. After having a routine day, I traveled off to the grocery store at 8pm to hit up the 50% off meats that happens daily. In Japan, everything that’s close to expiring gets marked down until they practically give it away before they throw it away...a nice philosophy I’d say.

Anyways...that’s not the story. As soon as I walked into the grocery store, some kid (who I later learned was 32 years old) started staring at me. Now, that in itself isnt ALL that strange in Japan, because being the only foreigner around it happens from time to time. Quite confidently and quickly, this kid came up to me and asked me where I was from...

It began as a friendly conversation. He said he was from Hokkaido, I said hey I love hiking, and I’ve always wanted to go to Hokkaido. Flustered, he pleaded for us to be friends. Before I knew it, he was literally running around the whole supermarket looking for a pen and paper to get my contact information. At this point I thought to myself, either this kid is really enthusiastic, or hes lost his marbles.

(I’m gonna have to make this short or it could go on a while...). He literally followed me through the grocery store....staring at me the whole time...If you ever want to ruin someones food shopping experience, just follow them around, stare at them, and smile like a mad man the whole time.

Then, he invited me to his house. I have no idea why....but I accepted. When we got inside his apartment, I quickly realized the kid was completely bonkers. He asked someone who was in the bath (who I luckily never met) to introduce themself...and they never replied (obviously, right? Who does a self introduction while A) taking a bath, and B) are behind closed doors. He proceeded to shake my hand continuously, time and time again. Anyone who reads this knows I’m not an awkward person ... but... this... was... sooo... awkward.

I told him I had to go home, eat some food, and sleep. Just when I thought I was free, he insisted on walking me home. There was no way I could show this kid where I live, so I (politely) sprinted away from his as fast as possible; hoppin fences and weaving in and out of cars to the safety of my apartment . Just kidding, about half way home I said “here is far enough, thank you”. He shook my hand for another 20 seconds or so, and we parted ways.

Just when Japan starts to get boring, I meet friendly old Tokiharu-san... Thankfully, I’ve got the kids number in my wallet now (along with his age, home address, hometown in Hokkaido, alternative LAN line phone number, and the sushi restaurant that he (washes dishes) at..along with a smiley face). Anytime I start to get the blues in Japan, I’m definitely gonna hit him up for a good time....

Thanks Tokiharu-san, you definitely made my day.

More posts (with photos) comin soon!

Lost in Translation...

Well, its happened to me. In an important meeting with my supervisor, I tried to day “Im sorry I can’t meet tomorrow, I have various things to do with a few friends. What I ACTUALLY said was, “Im sorry I can’t meet tomorrow, I have erotic things to do with my friends. I confused IRORO, with EROERO...as in....erotica erotica. Loosely traslated, I essentially said I was planning to have a gangbang with my friends...

To make matters ever more comical, when I was rehearsing a speech I have to give (with the same supervisor), I was prouncing another word incorrectly. The word for “major” (in college) is the same word as “masterbation”, just emphasized differently...so... (once again loosly translated) me trying to say “I majored in Psychology for 4 years” actually came out as “I masterbated to Psychology for 4 years...

...Good god...

Summer Dancing Festival

Saturday marked the celebration of Summer in Ibara, Okayama. Most cities towns in Japan celebrate the four seasons, and Ibara jams out by dancing and fireworks. Workin for city government, I'm part of one of the designated groups that dances. But wait...we haven't learned any dances? No worries, just go out there and COPY everyone. Oh lord... The photo above is the little outfit that was given to me. Directly (and somewhat indirectly) translated, it reads: Ibara City Hall Worker for the Betterment of Society...or something like that?

Anyways, back to the dancing...it kicked off with these chika's doing some crazy traditional dancing...

Turns out the dancing wasn't all that bad after all.... There were 3 dances they did over and over...progessing the streets and city blocks around the city. Didn't take that long to learn, and thank God there wasn't much technique...as indicated by my ridiculously drunk Japanese co-workers who were shoving each other, repeatidly picking their wedgies, and making fun of each others genetial...That's the way to celebrate, right?!

Dancing went late into the night. What happened after all the dancing stopped? More a boozin'... and the first one that passed out got teabagged! Just kidding, but I was tempted do that whole 'cultural exchange' thing I signed up for...

A Taste of Japan

The last two days have been full of Enkai's (work parties). Nearly every meal has been celebrated with my co-workers...all paid for by someone other than myself. All you can drink, all you can eat, all the fun you can possible have. The food has been adventurous. Raw shrimp, a boatload of raw fish and seafood, raw horse, and certainly last but not least, a live squid... we've eaten it all.

Regrettably, I haven't taken many photos, but today I got a few shots of a lunch I went out to with some random lady. It was a nine course meal, here are some of my better photos:

Started off with this little dish - some raw fish with some delicious sauce...

Next, good ole fashion sushi. Didn't recognize most the fish, or the sauce on top, but it was truly amazing...

This was some sort of cold potato soup, with locally grown fresh peaches underneath it. Sounds distgusting, but it was actually a pleasant combination.

some cooked fish, with an edible rose.

One of the main courses, spinach, some home made dumplingish thingy, and a tasty local tomato on top.

Pear mint jello.. mmm

Meatloaf-ish thingy. with some complimentary horseradish sauce, and garlic chips off to the side.

Pasta...ish?

We had the choice of pasta or rice for the next dish. I chose pasta, seeing as I think im gonna get enough rice these next few months, anyway... Wonderful choice...and that tasty looking green leaf wasn't edible...as indicated by the chef laughing at me when I spit it out on the plate... I was slightly worried it was rude...but then I thought to myself, "I guess its not rude if you spit something out that shouldn't be eaten in the first place, right?". Right.

Desert.

Funny, how any Japanese person's idea of a good desert is mysteriously nothing but FRUIT, with maybe a little sweet sauce on top. This was pretty cool though - the chef said that all the fruits were grown in the neighborhood, and the area we live in is famous for grapes. While being a bit thick skinned for my liking, they were indeed delicious.

Good ole fashion Tiramisu.. did I say Japanese couldn't make good deserts? I was wrong...

Mmm, Oishii...

A Tour of Ibara City

Throughout the last couple of days, my supervisors have randomly taken us out of the city office for 'car rides'. They've taken us to cool spots all around the city. Super markets, shopping centers, cell phone stores, the schools we'll be teaching at, etc. Finally, they took us to the Kyuu-Dou (Archery facility). It was amazing. There were some middle schoolers from Hiroshima practicing. The bows they were shooting were nearly twice their length, and the target was about 80 yards away (and less than 24 inches diameter). Needless to say, they rarely hit the target, but they were all amazing shots. I was allowed to snap one quick photo:

I imagine i'll find myself in the Kyuu-Dou soon enough...

Off to Okayama!

Leaving Tokyo, im headed off to Ibara, Okayama. Okayama (岡山) is literally tanslated as, "hills and mountains". I was eager to see if the place I was going to live actually lived up to its name. First, however, was the airport. Pictured above was my plane ticket. Notice anything interesting? It doesn't have my name (or anyones name) on it. In fact, no one ever checked any ID, ever. Can you believe that its possible to fly dometically without any identification? I thought it was quite interesting. I also thought this sign was quite interesting...

Apparently its no thang to bring doggies on the plane, either. Regrettably, short nosed dogs are no longer allowed to fly. I wonder if too many of them wet their cages during take-off or something...

Anyways, as we descended in the plane..the entire area was nothing but rolling hills and huge mountains. Like much of Japan, the scenery was breathtaking... I had arrived at my new home. 　(photos coming soon...)

Tour of Tokyo

So its my last night in Tokyo before heading to the land I'll be living in for the next year of my life, so I decided to walk around a bit with a couple friends I made at Orientation. First, a shot from my hotel window. Who knew there were so many trees in Tokyo?

What should you expect if you ever visit this place? Lots of these...

And, lots of these...


That's right, a cigarette vending machine. 4 years ago cigs were 300 Yen out of the machine, now they are 320...still not worth the tar in your lungs!

Next, we searched for a whole in the wall restaurant, and boy did we find it. Classic Ramen shop, just what I wanted. for 7 bucks, I got a huge, huge bowl of amazing Ramen. Pork, noodles, Egg, and greens with seaweed on top. Old fashion ticket ordering was something I had forgotten, here's the ticket machine:

And the ramen we ordered from the ticket machine

I was just astounded by its deliciousness. After I finished, I asked my buddy what he thought the little floaty white things were in my broth... He said, 'I know exactly what they are, balls of FAT'.

Wow, no wonder why it was so good. To make the situation more gluttonously perfect, the guy workin came back around and offered us a second bowl on the house. We couldn't resist. The only thing missin? Something to drink...

We visited a 7-11 next door, which apparently sold liquor. Check out this bottle sittin on the shelf.

Ok, now lets analyze this... 2.7 liters (over a half gallon...) 25% alcohol (pretty darn strong), for 1280 Yen (roughly 13 bucks). No wonder why so many Japs are alcoholics. The place was full of ridiculously cheap liquor and beer. But I had my sights set on yet another somethin somethin I've been cravin for a while...

There's few things like getting to meander through the streets, waving to cops while drinkin a beer. It may be just because drinkin open bottles on the street is illegal in America, but it sure seems like a treat. We chilled on the bridge, watching the Toyko night life pass us by while enjoying good ole Japanese brewskies.

On the way back we ran into a bookstore. For those that can't read it, it says, "ROWAN bookstore" I peeped inside, it was a porno shop.

Oh Tokyo, how I'll miss you...

ENGRISH!

It never gets old. My first few days are filled with lectures and seminars. I just got out of "Elementary Lessons Plans", where a native Japanese woman with excerrent Engrish skills was in charge. She...was...a...complete...spaz. Less than 5 minutes into the seminar, she instructed us with this golden rule: "we are ways use big boys wire fall in language!!". Umm.... what? " WE ARE WAYS USE BIG BOYS WIRE FALL IN LANGUAGE!! ARE SO, BIG GESTURE AND BIG SMIRE!!". I about fell off my chair snickerin.. what the hell is she trying to say? My small group eventually concluded "We always use big voice while [speaking] foreign language. Also, big gesture and big smile!"

Then, we were talking about professions. She asked someone, what would you rike to do? The girl replied, 'I would like to be a writer'. The Japanese woman paused...and then said, "Ohhh, Gasorine!". Most the kids in the class didn't get it, but the Japanese woman confused writer, with LIGHTER. As in...a lighter with gasoline (or lighter fluid...) inside it. Holy moly...I rove Engrish...

Western Imitations...

A fun facet of Japanse culture is how they try and imitate Western culture. For the most part, they do a great job, but everywhere you see the 'flavor' they've added of their own. Sometimes it works, most the time....it doesn't. Here are a few that I experienced this morning.

Breakfast: Eggs, bacon, toast, yogurt, fruit, and OJ - Good ole American grub! But why stop there? Wouldn't breakfast be better if there were mixed vegetables, french fries, and salad? Apparently the Japanese think so. Also, they missed the memo that scrambled eggs shouldn't be canned... This photo is our day 2 breakfast, which regrettably didn't have french fries like yesterday...



Shower: Definitely one of the coolest little things I've seen. You know when you get out of the shower and your mirrors are all fogged with steam? Somehow they've made it so a section of the mirror is resistant to fogging, no matter how hot and steamy it gets in there.



Toilets in Japan are known as "squatty potties". Frequently, however, there is a Western toilet that you can sit on. But again, why stop there? Why not have a toilet that...washes your ass for you? and if you're a woman...well....yea. Of all the things Ive been adventurously trying, getting a jet of water sprayed up my butt is not one of them. If I ever get the courage, i'll be sure to post it (pending the results). Photos probably won't be attached, tho...

First Night on the Town

I arrived at Tokyo orientation along with 850 kids from around the world - US, UK, Canada, Aussies, Kiwis (New Zealanders), Jamaicans, Germans, French, Trinidad folks, and many more. I really only knew one other person, a buddy of mine named Mark:

Room assignments were random, and Mark and I got assigned to the same room (1 in 850 chance...). We were super excited, actually. Neither of us were shamed with turning our suitcases upside down, making a mess of the place, and turning our hotel room into a uniquely American joint by leaving our boxers sittin around. I even hung an American flag I brought on the wall, just to make sure.

After takin a much needed shower after a long flight, we hit up the town. Immediately I found a sign that reminded me just why I love Japan so much...

1,500 Yen ($15) All you can drink beer and liquor (Nomi-hodai). As fun as it sounded, we were quite exhausted and passed up the opportunity. Better to not get wasted before our first days of orientation, anyhow. Plenty a nomi-hodai left throughout our stay, thats for sure.

A few hundred feet later, I stumbled upon one of the things I missed most about Japan: Real ramen noodles. I forgot how quick and easy it was to get the most delicious soup in the world (not to be confused with American Ramen...it would be like comparing Spam to a real bacon..)

The characters read ra - me n.

We decided to go to the noodles shop next door. What happened? I ordered hot noodles (with spice and beef). But...no broth came in it? I payed for my meal, and looked around wondering whether or not I was missin the memo or somethin. Other people had broth.... and then I saw a spout near the water fountain. I ended up filling my bowl with green tea. Ever tried Spicy Beef Green Tea Udon Noodles? I imagine not many people have, but perhaps a few foreigners. Anyways, I thought it was quite delicious. I added some deep fried pumpkin, as well as eggplant on top. Whole meal cost about 6 bucks. Mmmm

To finish the night off, we walked around Shinjuku station, and from what I hear its one of the most heavily used train stations in all of Tokyo (and the world?). At night, its mainly the younger crowd. Perfect place to just chill. This was late Sunday night... on a Friday or Saturday night, there's hundred of kids kickin' it.

For the music lovers, there's entertainment everywhere...

Around the station Mark and I were the only foreigners. Ironically, a Japanese guy came up to us and asked us for directions. Mark and I looked at each other like "shouldnt WE be the ones asking for directions? You're Japanese, and this is our first day in Japan". We ended up giving him directions, and 50 meters later we realized we sent him in the opposite direction. *chuckle* What else would you expect from a gaijin?

Absolutely exhausted and jetlagged, we crashed immediately. Even if we had the energy, we still probably wouldn't have cleaned up our room...

Ballroom in Japan

Can you believe it? As soon as we walked into the hotel I saw an amateur youth couple doing the Paso Doble in full costume. Long had I wondered what the ballroom scene would be like in Japan, and I got a good taste of it my first day here. The photo above is of a standard formation team. I *accidentally* interuppted their practice and asked if there was a competition. They told me a very famous japanese dancer (whom I was not familiar with) was celebrating his 50th year of dance. They were there to do a showcase, along with 9 other couples / formations. Being the foreigner I was, I pushed the boundries and asked for a photo! The formation team was above.

I tried to sneak in the ballroom, but even the guests had tailsuits on. I didn't have the balls try and talk my way in, or pretend like I was a professional photographer (especially on my first day in Japan). I did, however, meander around. I chatted with another couple; they were outstanding dancers. Not sure whether or not they were professionals, but they would surely be in the top 10 amateurs of the US. They had a stellar showcase. I asked them to give me a pose ;P

Arrival in Tokyo!

Flying above the clouds, the sun was shining bright. As soon as the skyscrapers came into view, it became clear that a layer of smog prevents the sun from ever reaching this metropolis -arguably the largest city in the world when you account for its vast urban sprawl. As we meandered through the airport and onto the bus, it seems like dusk was approaching, but there were still several hours of daylight...I can't believe how thick the smog is here. Yet another reason why I'd never like to live in Tokyo...

JET Diaries..

Today marks my first day of JET: Japan Exchange and Teaching program. English speakers from all over the world are recruited to come to Japan and act as cultural ambassadors in order to help natives improve their English communication skills. This program is something I've wanted to do for years, ever since studying in Japan 4 years ago and having the opporutunity to walk in a Japanese classroom where a JET was teaching. It was clear this particular JET teacher was molding the lives of Japanese students, and I aspired to do the same. Now, my own adventure has begun.